Aunt Helen

(This was written yesterday...just didn't get to post it until today.)



I’m feeling invigorated today. I’m not sure if it’s because I worked out this morning and then proceeded to take a 2+ mile walk pulling over 50 lbs of small children in a little red wagon… or because I’m just feeling grateful.

Either way, I’m happy.

Oddly enough, I have wanted to blog about sadness lately. It’s everywhere. It’s for real. The pain is deep and not temporary. And I feel like I’m in the middle of it…wondering how I’m supposed to respond and be helpful and not an annoyance. The sadness isn’t really mine, per se, but I’m surrounded by it and it affects me.

I don’t know how to express this thought without sounding silly…but I wonder if the sadness all around is because I’m getting older. I feel kinda’ like Jessica who, at the ripe old age of 3 will say, “When I was little I liked Elmo. But not anymore” Many people would tell me that I’m not old yet. And that at 34½, I have a lot of living to do…but life seems more “serious” these days. I’m getting old.

That thought, alone, is depressing.

Anyhow, despite the sadness and despair (and I’m talking about more than just my age here!), I’m feeling grateful today.

My morning was wide open for possibility and I wondered what I should do with my “free” time. I said a prayer asking God if there was anything He needed me to do. Not hearing a “voice from the clouds”, I decided to take a walk with my little girls and visit my Great Aunt Helen. I’ve never visited Aunt Helen at her house so this would most certainly be a surprise visit!

She greeted us in a pink floral house dress that looked like it was taken straight out of a magazine from the 1950’s. She reminded me of what my grandmother would have looked like if I had stopped over unannounced at any point. She greeted us with a smile and invited us in, making no mention of the fact that she wasn’t expecting us. The girls and I went in for 20 minutes or so and had some cookies before we had to make the trek back home.

I think visiting Aunt Helen made me feel grateful because in some small way, that visit made a difference in the world – both hers and mine.

Grief is for real. Pain is for real. Anxiety is for real. Everyone experiences it at some point…some with more intensity than others. And I’m not exactly sure what the tie in is to my feeling grateful this morning except to say that exercising and taking time out for others is a way to lift your spirits and take your focus off of the “tough stuff” of life.

Luke 6:38 says, “Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” So if you need joy today, find some way to bring joy to others. It may take time for the joy to come back to you but rest assured, it will.

I really had a great day today. I think I may try to visit Aunt Helen more often. But maybe I’ll call first!